Family “SECRETS” and HEALTH Problems

Why are there so many children who get very sick already as babies, often short after their birth?

What causes SKIN DISEASES like Eczema, Neuro Dermatitis or severe Allergies?

With EFT language you would say the baby’s energy system is disrupted. With the language of FAMILY CONSTELLATION the answer is: a family member has lost his/her place in the family system. Nobody talks about this family member anymore because he/she is dead or excluded because of moral codes “invented” by the society. Examples are: mentally disabled children, children given away for adoption or aborted children.

As there is no place for them in society which pretends to be so religious, holy, politically correct, perfect and innocent, there’s also no place in the family. It would be such a “shame”, wouldn’t it?

But imagine there would be a system of unconditional love that has the only law that people always give their best depending on their personal growth at the present moment in their lives. Nobody is better or worse than anybody else but everybody has to be honest and communicate each and everything to all the other members of the system. There is no punishment but healing….

Nice dream, you may say, but in family constellation you can see how the healing process can be started as soon as there’s given place to a family member or as soon as every family member becomes part of the family.

In Holistic Healing the skin represents the “Map of the Soul”and the “Personal, private Protection Shield”! A skin disease shows us that either a part of the world or a person is denied or there’s aggression against oneself for being born – as a result of guilt.

As a therapist I would immediately ask for family members that are excluded or dead and if somebody would tell me about an aborted child I would know that there lies the biggest part of the baby’s skin disease. Because this baby (soul) knows about the dead sibling even if nobody ever talked about it or even still tries to forget this hurtful pain connected to the memory. This baby feels guilty because it is allowed to be alive and it tries everything to connect to the brother’s/sister’s soul and give him/her a place in its family. This baby doesn’t want to look lovely for its mom and dad or become their undevided attention because it can feel that its parents don’t want to give part of their attention to their dead child who still belongs to the family. Sometimes the father doesn’t even know about this child because the mother became pregnant with a former partner and never told her husband. But SECRETS like this can really destroy a family.

In therapy it is a very painful process for a mother to admit her past actions. But any repressed memory will pop up again and again when there’s a special trigger and as soon as the mother can face it, forgive herself and honour her dead child the healing process not only sets her free, but helps her sick child, her marriage and finally her whole life!

For me the most impressing picture is the cover of the German book “Seinen Platz finden” (To find one’s place) by Constanze Potschka-Lang, that shows the connection of Family Constellation Therapy, Kinesiology and NLP.

I'll honour you as my CHILD and give you a place in my heart!

I'll honour you as my CHILD and give you a place in my heart!